Business as Usual...

Seem to hear about it more and more these days. Adultery, divorce, extortion, quackery, etc. happening in churches. The most recent I heard was about this twisted little power-play between a Head Pastor and his Associate Pastor. It ended very badly. No, one did not kill the other, but I suspect there was some heavy-duty character assasination involved. Ouch! After sharing the story, my friend expressed determination to stay with the church, despite the insanity he has witnessed. This was my response:

"I'm not surprised by much these days. Seen a great deal of this- both in my own life and in the lives of many I loved. We constantly hear of the nightmares my Father-in-law has to deal with as he pastors 2 churches in PA. Poor guy!

I stuck around trying to grin & bear the insanity-overlooking mistreatment and trying to make a difference only to receive more slaps on the face. Forgive? Yes- ALL of us make mistakes. Continue to play along? No thanks. The last series of insults was too much to bear, so we left the church and haven't regretted that decision in the slightest.

Christ was so wearied by the blindness, arrogance & mind-games in the church of His time, He seemed to prefer meeting with seekers and non-believers on mountaintops and seasides. It was churchy people who put Him on that cross. Why? Because He had a genuine connection with God, spoke honestly and did not cater to their whims.

Organized religion has it's good points, but by it's very nature is too structured and formal. It has a tendancy to tread with heavy boots upon individuality. Although there are advantages to having ranks & offices, the infrastructure always leads to petty politics and control issues- even among the most well-intentioned.

When religion becomes a well-oiled machine, it tends to foster pride and a sense of obligation- rather than humble service or sincere devotion. If this is not the case, why is the success of any outreach effort measured only by how much offering came in or how many baptisms were performed??

Church- in order to BE a church, must declare, "This is who we are, how we eat, what we believe and how we must behave". If you want to be one of us, you either get in the box and conform or you're a hypocrite.

In the last 2 yrs of my journey, I have visited/mingled with every major denomination that exists in this country and (with few exceptions) find them equally guilty of abuse & neglect. They finger-point and reject the wounded people who need love most.

There are certainly ways to connect with God that DO NOT involve being a bonafied member of any church. Moses, David, Elijah and John the Baptist did just fine in the wilderness. In fact, they had a more genuine spirituality- they were not distracted or contaminated by all the political strivings, propoganda and power-plays that go on.

I think people who are raised within any denomination and have never known anything else cannot see that it's possible to be spiritually-minded and a sincere Christ follower without having your name on a church roster.

Though I admire the dedicated spirit of those who remain behind to deal with all the nonsense, (there's a ton of it) I could no longer do so. For my own emotional, spiritual health, I left and my family with me. If that makes me "weak" or a "wimp", so be it. But remember, it took 2 decades of abuse before I finally left.

The ministry was more than happy to use up most of my husband's prime & his time, knowing full-well, he had a lonely wife & 4 kids at home who needed him. They were more than happy to pat us on the back for living on a shoe-string budget, sacrificing any financial progress. The road to burn-out and bankruptcy was paved with golden bricks.

When corrupt church leaders destroyed our lives, the denomination sat back tisk-tisking. Not a finger was lifted to come to our defense. (Don't rock the boat too much, or make corrupt people be accountable for poor behavior- might upset someone and not get re-elected to a high-ranking office.) Politics in the church aren't very different from those in the government. The little guy takes the fall, so the organization can continue to prosper unscathed.

Actually had one person tell me that we "should stop complaining and consider it a privilege to take a fall for the church". Yeah? You say that when you're bankrupt and there's only beans, crackers, Stewed tomatos & Ramens in YOUR pantry!! It will take my family a long time to heal and re-build our lives. (Fortunately, the wrong that was done did not financially devastate the other families in the ministry like it did us.)

If God rejects us because we left an unhealthy environment, so be it, but I think He completely understands."

And in the wise words of Forrest Gump, "That's all I have to say 'bout that...." ;o)